Akko

About a month ago, Pavel and I started going on weekend day trips. Our first was to Akko, a coastal city north of Haifa. Akko is notable for several reasons. In 1798, Napolean unsuccessfully laid seige on the city. In the picture below, you can see part of the protective wall that surrounds the old city. Akko is also one of the few cities in Israel in which both Jews and Arabs live together. Pavel and I discuss this more in depth in the podcast, but I'll just mention that in general, this doesn't create too many problems, although conflicts arise from time to time. But mostly, I was there for the hummus.

You see, Akko is known as having the best hummus in the world. I learned this while on my birthright trip. We were walking by the water in Akko's old city when Yoni, our tour guide, pointed out a restaurant, saying that this restaurant, here in this tiny city, was home to the best hummus in the world. Did we stop and eat there? Of course not. There wasn't any time to stop. There's never any time for hummus! I made a vow that I would come back to Israel some day, and when I did, I was going to find that restaurant and have me some hummus. In other words, Akko's hummus is secretly the real reason I'm in Israel. (I know what you're thinking. You're thinking, "How much better can the hummus be in Akko? I've had hummus in literally every other city in the world and there's a lot of good hummus out there." If you ask me, you should stop being so cynical.)

Somehow--and I don't know how this happened--Pavel and I couldn't find the hummus restaurant that Yoni vaguely pointed out to me nine months ago. Anyone who knows me knows that I'm usually great at things like that, but in this case, I came up short. Instead of eating the best hummus in the world, we went to some crappy, overpriced tourist trap that was listed in the guidebook as a place that only "insiders" know about. In other news, "insider" is my new favorite pseudonym for "white person." Here's an example of how it can be used:

Pavel: What did you think of the shuk in Akko?

Sam: It sure had a lot of insiders.

Pavel: Yeah, our guidebook sure does a great job of making us feel like insiders.

Some of our fellow insiders shopping at the shuk

What really frustrates me, though, is how stupid I was about finding the hummus place. I could have called Yoni and asked him what the hummus place is called, where it is, and how to get there. I could have also asked any person in Akko those same questions. Did I? Nope. Why? Because I'm a moron. Now I'm going to have to make Aliyah. I really don't want to do that, but how else will I ever get to try the best hummus in the world? I think I'll make a good soldier.

New Akko city street

This view does not impress me

Byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee